Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Fat days and putting things in perspective

So Fat days ! hummmphhh it's been a while since I've had a true FAT day!!! I remember the fat days pre banding.. the self loathing.. the desperation to loose weight.. the "I'll do anything" vow.. the tears and the fear. The pre banded fat days were dark dark days.

Since being banded I haven't had a day like that .... but today was close ! Whats with that? I am the lowest weight since 2007, any day now I will be at my lowest since I was maybe 12 years old. So why today did I feel so horrible in my skin so sick of my body so sick of all the clothes I own.

Our minds and bodies work in the most crazy ways! I'll never understand it and I think I'll always have to tame the beast that is fat days!

I did have one thought... 6 months is the longest I've ever stuck to anything in the past... So here I am at 6 months and 4 days and no sign of giving up and couldn't self sabotage easily even if I tried! So yay for making the change I cant wait for th 1 year mile stone!!!

So in band news post my fill 2 weeks ago I've had a tight tight band. Fluids mostly since then, I had a stuck incident a week after the fill so went back to fluids. Ive just moved to mushies and they are finally going down nicely! I've noticed that I can only eat 1/2 cup of food over 30mins.

Tonight I had soup potato and leek homemade with leeks from my garden, then 1 egg scrambled with a tablespoon of organic cottage cheese. It took me an hour but i got it all down no slim to vomit no pb's !!!!!

So back to basic band rules

1. No fluids before, during or after meals
2. Eat slow
3. Chew chew chew
4. stay hydrated!!!! drink between meals!!!

K xx

2 comments:

Jacquie said...

I am so with you on following the rules. I had a fill on 9/16, tight a few days than a week of NOTHING...I am now tighter than when I got the fill so i am taking it very slow!

My six months was on 9/24 and I have never followed anything for that long in the past. I know that I can do this this time and that is what it is all about!

Missed you in Chicago. Let me know where you will be when you come to the states next year. I would love to meet you!

Unknown said...

Fat days suck, don't they! Sorry to hear you had one.

Re the fill, sounds like you've got good restriction. Can't wait to get my first fill!